i suppose you could shove everything he leaves lying around in his bed, and the slops in his shoes. edit, but first buy paper plates. uh oh
I'd be afraid to go in his room when he is gone. He might have a trip wire bomb in there for all I know.
Lewdog, I'm in the same situation as you. I live in a house with my boyfriend and his roommate. They've lived together for four years consecutively this time, about 8 or 10 years total, I can't remember which. And my roommate is a total... slob. I don't have a job currently (boyfriend is letting me work on my novels full time ), so I took on the bulk of the housework when I moved in to help out in any way that I can. Well now my roommate has deemed me the house-chore lady. And he's disgusting. First of all, he doesn't shower very often, and he never leaves his computer chair except to smoke and go to work. So not only does he smell, but his room and his computer chair smells. And unfortunately for me, his computer chair is right next to the front door so everyone who visits smells him immediately. He also has the bathroom problem -- his toilet is brown and disgusting. I'm sure there's stuff growing in it too, but unlike you, we have two full bathrooms in the house, one in the hallway, and one in my room. Any time someone visits, they use my bathroom. So the only person who has to deal with that cesspool is my roommate. Second, he doesn't pick up after himself. Ever. His computer desk is piled with papers, plates, glasses, silverware, toothpicks, empty cigarette boxes, and medication. He rarely puts his dishes in the dishwasher, or even the sink (hello?? how hard is that to do??) so then my cat, who is allergic to everything, licks the food off of them when I'm not looking and has diarrhea all over the floor. Then my roommate complains that my cat shit... Well, maybe if you'd clean up, we wouldn't have this problem. Third, he doesn't help me clean at all. In six months, I've seen him take out the trash once. My boyfriend helps me more than that. I spend everything Thursday cleaning (I don't know why Thursday.. It just works out that way), and he never helps me. He just sits on his damn chair and watches. Yesterday, boyfriend and I went out to clean up the yard. And our roommate just sat inside. He'd come out to smoke, watch us clean, then go back inside. This house is more his than it is mine (since I don't pay bills) and he does less to take care of it than I do. When I first started cleaning, I was really considerate. I'd pick up the dishes off his desk and put them in the dishwasher. I'd stack the papers. I'd pick up the trash. I'd vacuum under his chair. Now? I don't do shit for him. lol I throw his papers on his desk that he leaves on the table. I throw his trash and dirty smelly socks in his chair. I pile his dishes upside down on his desk so that my cats can't get into it. The only thing I throw away are the toothpicks, because my cat will get those and swallow them. Does it help? No. But I'm not picking up after him anymore. If he makes a mess, I tell him to clean it up. If he leaves his clothes in the dryer (who am I kidding, he always leaves his clothes in the dryer), they somehow still smell terrible and I don't want to touch them, so I make him take them to his room. Or if he isn't home, I drop them on the floor in his room. I'm not his maid. I'm not his nurse, or his chauffeur, or his mother, or his damn therapist. So I'm not helping him with anything anymore. Fortunately, his path of destruction is relatively small, so I don't have to deal with it much. And my boyfriend is also talking about moving out just the two of us. Our roommate doesn't help with anything besides the bills, so why keep him around? All he does is make things messy and complain (he's a chronic bitcher). So I think we'll be looking for our own place soon, which will dramatically lower my stress level. Lewdog, if you figure out a way to make him clean up his act without having to do it for him, please let me know. lol
Sounds like I don't have the only slob in the world! I do have to agree with the first impression thing. My apartment used to smell welcoming. Now it smells like stale smoke, feet, and sardines when you first walk in the door. His bedroom is just right of the front door. It irks me to no end. The worst part of it all, is that I used to be the one that many of my old friends used to think was the OCD clean freak. When they would come over I would tell them to "please excuse the mess," and they would laugh and say, "if this is what messy looks like then what do you consider clean?!?!" I also used to be the one that co-works would get mad at because when there was down time I would be constantly cleaning and picking up things. They would tell me to stop that things are already clean, but I would go a step further and clean the fine details that customers see, but people that work there and see every day don't normally notice until it is pointed out to them. Co-workers would complain that I was setting a high standard to the bosses of having a clean work area that they would be forced to do theirselves, and they didn't like that. Last thing for those that have lived with people for awhile, does it bother you when a guy pees in the bathroom but doesn't shut the door and you have to listen to it? It drives me absolutely nuts. It also drives me crazy that I ask him over and over and over again to shut his bathroom door because I don't want my cat going in there to play in his mess, and he can't do a simple task.
I think it's just plain rude, yes. Now, this may be one of those things that depends on the household behavior of wherever you were raised--like whether you wander around in your underwear or not. But that gives him an excuse only until you complain. As soon as you ask him to shut the door, and he doesn't, he's in the wrong. It's none of my business why you don't just move somewhere else, either now or the instant the lease is up, but I wanted to say that if you're staying there out of any sense of obligation or loyalty to him, to the landlord, etc., I'd suggest that any such obligation is erased by these circumstances.
Yup... All of those things are me too. lol When I would get bored at work, I'd bust out cleaner and a brillo pad and go to town on some dirty stuff. Cleaning always made me feel accomplished, so I'd do it often. Now, though, I'm just stressed out about it. I'll clean up after myself, and my boyfriend because he tries to help. But I'm done cleaning up after my roommate. I just started making his own spaces MORE messy so that he'll be forced to clean it himself. And yes... he pees with the door open... every.. single.. time. I could understand at first, thinking maybe he isn't used to have another roommate, so he just doesn't think to shut the door. But no. He still does it. Sometimes, he even takes a shower with the door open. Drives me crazy. Sometimes I plug my ears. Or leave the room. I just can't stand it. He's literally the worst roommate ever. Before me and my boyfriend were talking about moving out together, we had a fourth (male) friend who wanted us to go in on a house with him. We talked for three days, just him, me, and my boyfriend, about how messy our roommate is. And if he's going to move into this new fancy clean house with us, his habits are going to have to change or he's going to have to find somewhere else to live. That still holds true, of course. And I can only imagine how much fun that conversation will be... -_-
The reason I have continued to stay is, it is downtown which helps because my car is broken down, the apartment is furnished, and the rent includes water, trash, cable, and internet. I would have hoped by now I would have been able to be more dependent by now.
How do we know you don't suffer from DID and one of your personalities is the slob that this personality is bitching about?
